im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
