On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
