Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
someone threw a dead crab at me
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
