you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
