Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(718): View more from New York

At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.

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(515): View more from Iowa

The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.

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(636): View more from Missouri

He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.

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(757): View more from Virginia

Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm

(1-757): View more from Virginia

Dick in a box?

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(310): View more from California

She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL

(310): View more from California

so no, not her best night

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(408): View more from California

My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.

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(425): View more from Washington

I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey

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(575): View more from New Mexico

it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...

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