no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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