Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Randomize
