No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
