But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Randomize