Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
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