I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
