We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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