like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Found your dick twin last night
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
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