I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
