Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Randomize
