No stitches, just platelets and will power
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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