So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
you're hired as official boob wrangler
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
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