What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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