your thong is hanging out like whoa
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
