you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
