Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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