they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
