Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Randomize
