just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
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