: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
