Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Randomize
