Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Randomize