K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize