he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
