I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
