dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Randomize
