i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
