I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
