Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
