Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
