if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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