I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize