I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
