I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
