tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Randomize
