All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
