I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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