Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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