At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Randomize