Porn is love you can see.
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Randomize
