do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
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