i permit you to call me
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Randomize
