If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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