No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Randomize
