I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
