Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Randomize
