if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
